tonight my own thoughts are driving me crazy…i want to be free from the restraints i set on myself.  free from my own pressures.  the ones i created for myself, the ones that were by products of those firsthand mistakes, and the ones from outside sources.  ive always been too much of a giver, it led me to a dead end street.  i crawled my way back to the fork in the road and made sure i forgot every single graham cracker crumb i left to get back to there. 

- i want to take you away with me when i go.

there are many parts of you ive had before, and i still want them.  ive never been so intoxicated by one person, one thing at all in my entire life.  i can still taste you, although its been almost a week. i can still feel your fingers in my hair.  a week seems pathetic, a small amount of time to be pining about…but its been so much longer than that since ive actually had your heart. aside from one night that you let it out to me, at our spot…laying up looking at beautiful grey clouds.  i just want you again, your soul…not just the body that encases it.  that body is beautiful and that body is unique, but i think your soul has a much more prominent presence. 

speaking of souls.  sometimes i wish there were a way to remove them from our bodies, bodies are such useless and foolish things.  i wish we had no option but to show our true colors, no make up or hair dye, even though they cover physical flaws, it seems you draw a sense of entitlement from that, which leads you to believe you can cover deeper flaws. and it happens, it rings so true. the most corrupt pathetic people can seem like the most special.  i think i hate that the most. how someone so close to you can be such a fucking down-right bitch.

this was supposed to be poetic, beautiful, ive been trying to hard to get everything out of my head and on to paper. out of my head and into pictures, nothing is fufilling anymore and my anger is starting to show again.

i need a fucking adventure.